attacked again

I had another panic attack last week. It also came out of the blue. They always do. First time my husband has seen one. Scared him so very much. He tried to do what he thought was right. But still he pinned me down and that makes me worse. I don't know what to do when this happens though. Went running off into the night. Fear of being chased by demons not there. Was told I was paranoid. I don't remember it much. Mostly just the feeling of fear. It has been three years since my last one. I have not told my doctor or case worker yet. Don't really want to. I feel so ashamed afterward. And I hate people knowing that I was out of control and that I don't know why. And that they must think awful things about me. Any control I have showed them is now ruined. And they don't think they could ever trust me. So really messes me up.

2 comments:

  1. Oh I hate PA's!! Don't give it more significance than it warrants, though. Definitely don't waste time worrying about what people think. I managed to hold down a professional job for years with everyone and their dog knowing I had them. People just looked at it as one of my "quirks". Sorry to hear that you went through that. PA's suck.

    http://nervous.typepad.com

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  2. Thank You for the support. I am glad to know it is not just me. But they are pretty scary to me. Again thanks.

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